The Root of Online Trolling Is Shame
Why hurt people hurt people—and how to stop the cycle. A deep dive into the psychology of online cruelty and the shame that drives it.
A Book by Jazmine L. Ramzy
The Art of Powerful Listening in a World That Won't Stop Talking
is because you've stopped listening to yourself?
"We're more connected than ever—and lonelier, angrier, more divided than we've been in generations."
Shut The F**k Up isn't another book about being a better listener. It's about learning to listen to yourself FIRST—to your intuition, your body, your truth—before you can truly hear anyone else.
Through the intertwined stories of seven people across different generations, races, and family structures, this book reveals how self-betrayal creates envy, shame destroys connection, and even the anger you think "no one hears" is poisoning your relationships.
But this isn't a book about doom. It's a roadmap. A guide to breaking the toxic cycles, healing your attachment wounds, and reclaiming real connection in a digital world designed to keep us distracted.
Start Your Journey Today
41 powerful discussion questions + 5 experiential exercises designed to create vulnerable, transformative conversations. Perfect for book clubs, therapy groups, or solo reflection.
Download Free Guide (PDF)Deep dives into the envy-shame-anger pipeline, ghosting culture, online trolling, people-pleasing, and what kids really need. 13,000+ words of transformation.
Individual essays also available in the Featured Writing section below
Core Concepts from the Book
Envy, Shame, and Anger—the three emotions that team up to destroy your relationships. Learn how they connect and how to break the cycle.
You're not envious of them. You're envious of the version of yourself you're not allowing to exist. Here's how to transform envy into aligned action.
How shame disguises itself in conversations: defensiveness, blame, attack, withdrawal, and contempt. Recognize them to disarm them.
Road rage, cruel self-talk, online trolling—the anger you discharge "harmlessly" is destroying you. Because YOU always hear it.
What Love Jones and Sade taught us about sitting with feelings. The lost art of letting moments breathe in a world of instant everything.
How to navigate high-context vs. low-context cultures, polychronic vs. monochronic time, and why your father-in-law's silence means "I accept you."
Essays on Listening, Connection, and Healing
Why hurt people hurt people—and how to stop the cycle. A deep dive into the psychology of online cruelty and the shame that drives it.
The hidden cost of people-pleasing and why listening to yourself is the most radical thing you can do. When grief meets self-betrayal.
How three toxic emotions team up to destroy your closest relationships—and how to break the cycle before it's too late.
They need you to get on the floor and play with them. How speaking their love language changes everything.
How technology rewired our attachment systems—and why each generation connects differently.